The Journal of Dean Winchester - Season 9 Part 1

A work of fiction - by sweetondean
(warning for language)

Entry One

Wake up Sammy, just wake up. I know you can do it. You’re stronger than this, man. You can’t let ‘em kill you like this. I won’t let you. Just open your eyes, and we’ll work the rest out. He’s gotta open his eyes. He’s gotta be okay. Come on Sammy, please. Please.

GOD’S HANDS? Was that Doctor fuckin’ serious? God’s hands? That is how we got into this mess in the first place, by playing God’s game. Now Sam is dead, or will be soon. Like I’m gonna trust my brother’s fate to God?? No. Not gonna happen. There’s gotta be a way outta this one. Gotta be.

I feel sick. What did I just do? I saved Sam, I think, but I had to trick him into it. Yeah...  I know he wouldn’t have wanted this, but he didn’t wanna die either. He told me that. He saw the damn light. He sees a life beyond this crap pile of an existence. So yeah, I’ve given him a shot at maybe having that one day. It was this or... It was this. No other choice. He ain’t gonna like it, I know it. But, maybe, just maybe, he’ll be thankful to be alive. I’m trusting this Ezekiel dude. And Cas vouches for him. Anyway, what's done is done. Sam’s gonna be okay now. That’s the important thing. Everything else we can deal with later. Sam’s alive. He’s getting fixed. It’s gonna be okay.

Entry Two

Great. The Bitch is back. Abaddon. Awesome. Something else to deal with. That was a close call. All around. I hope Sam swallowed my line of bull about killing all the demons. Is this Zeke dude gonna keep popping out like that? Because if he does, we’re gonna have to have a conversation. He’s supposed to be inside Sam fixing him, not suddenly appearing whenever he damn well pleases. That wasn’t our deal. Though, guess he saved Sam’s life. Again. I have a feeling I’m gonna be paying for this down the line. How’d everything get this screwed up? An angel inside my practically dead brother, the King of freakin’ Hell locked up in the bunker. Kevin’s flipping out. Poor kid don’t know the half of it. Jesus Christ if I can hold this one together it’s gonna be a fuckin’ miracle. And Sammy’s feeling great. He’s damn well happy. That’s good. I guess. Except he has no clue what’s really going on.

Entry Three

I’m gonna lose it. Cas died. Zeke brought him back to life, thank God. But then I gotta chuck him out of the Bunker? The guy’s eyes, the way he looked at me. I’ll never forget that look. He trusted me. He felt safe. With friends. I didn't want to do it...but I had no other choice. I don’t know how I’ll ever fix it with Cas. Maybe he'll understand when he knows why. Maybe not. And I don't know what to make of Zeke. He pops in and out so much, I’m gettin’ freakin’ whiplash. He’s worried Cas will bring the angels down on him? Why. What’s he hiding from? He's gotta be hiding something. I’m gettin’ real nervous. If he’s such a good guy, why would he be worried about being found? Damn it. I’m going crazy here. I can’t talk to no one about it. I’m bouncing off the freakin’ walls.

Entry Four

I feel like he’s stacking the chips against me, linin’ them up, waiting for his moment to call in his marker. But if he wasn’t here, Cas and Charlie would be dead. Thank God he could save Charlie. No way I could live with her blood on my hands. But I’m on my last nerve with this shit. I’m yelling Zeke's name at Sam. He’s suspicious as all hell. Askin' questions. The kid’s smart as a whip. I’m terrified he’s gonna put two and two together, chuck the angel out on his ass and wind up dead or worse. And there’s actually an OZ? Could life get any weirder? I don’t like Charlie going off with that Dorothy chick. She better look out for her.  Wicked Witch of the West… Fuck me.

Entry Five

Oh yeah. Sammy’s startin' to think something’s wrong. I keep lying at him, but he’s suspicious. One minute he's my brother and things seem normal and the next, he's not. I feel like I'm about to explode. I need to come clean. I gotta talk to Zeke and tell him we’ve gotta tell Sam what’s goin’ on. Just gonna have to risk it. I can’t stand this lying to my brother anymore. Not something this big. Somehow I’ll talk him into letting the angel stay put. I’ll figure it out. But he has to know. Though, can I risk it? Knowing him, he’d as soon die as be possessed again. Jesus. I don’t think I can risk it. It won’t be much longer. He’ll be fixed soon. The angel will go. I’ll tell him then. Once he’s well. He can hate me all he wants once he’s okay.

And whatever that mutt was gonna tell me about why dogs are really here is gonna haunt me for the rest of my days!

Entry Six

Steve the angel. Huh. Poor bastard. But this isn’t his fight anymore. Let him go live his life, be human, meet a girl, one that actually wants him and doesn’t try to kill him. Geeze Cas. Ha. I feel bad for the dude. I’ve gotta remember to check in with him now and then, make sure he’s doing okay. And do we believe Crowley? No reversing the angel fall spell? Yeah, well we’ll see. Everything that bastard says comes out crooked. I will say this though, if Sammy’s right and Crowley is addicted to the human blood… that right there is leverage.

Entry Seven

Man, it was good to see Sonny again. And Robin. She grew up nice. I’d pretty much put that whole time out of my memory. Hadn’t thought about it in years. I’d forgotten how good I had it there. Wonder what would’ve happened to me if dad never came back? Or if I never got back in the car? Not that that was ever gonna be an option. I wasn’t leavin’ Sammy out there alone. Couldn’t leave Sam. No way. But still. I can’t help but wonder how I would’ve ended up, had I not stepped back into the life….

Entry Eight

Okay, now I’m officially freaking out. I tried to tell Sam the truth and Zeke blocked me. Not only that, he pretty much threatened Sam. This whole, if he ejects me bullshit. This whole not long now. I dunno what to think anymore. But I’m starting to feel like this is all going nowhere good and fast. And why the hell would I be surprised by that? I’ve known from the beginning that it’d all end up biting me in the ass. But that didn’t matter, as long as Sammy was okay. But what if Sammy isn’t okay? What if this angel is just slinging me a line? I dunno what to believe. But my gut is screaming at me. Sammy thinks there’s something wrong with him. The kid is breaking my heart. I need to find a way to tell him what’s going on so he can stop kickin’ himself. Damn it. Everything’s going to hell as usual.

Good to see Jody though. And meet Suzy. Yeah, that part was real good.

Entry 9

I can’t. Oh God. Kevin, man I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I shoulda told you what was happening. I shoulda got you outta here. Protected you. Why didn’t I do that? Why the fuck didn’t I do that? The kid trusted me to take care of him. And now he’s dead. Like so many other’s before him. I’m poison. I can’t do anything right. Nothing. Everything I touch turns to shit or winds up six feet under. And Sam’s gone. Jesus. I don’t know if he’s even alive in there anymore. What if the angel burnt him out? I am such a fucking idiot trusting some angel I didn’t even know. Trusting him with Sam's life. Desperate fucking idiot. Who the hell has got my brother? Sammy. God. Okay, okay, I’ve gotta get my shit together. I’ve gotta go find that angel fuck and get my brother back, or put a stop to him, whatever I need to do. I’m not letting Sam live out his days as a piece of meat being dragged around by some angel douche. Oh God, I’m gonna be sick.

Okay Winchester, get it together. You did this, you fix it. However you need to. Fix what you can. I’ll find the angel. I’ll find Sam. I’ll find you Sammy, I promise. But first, I gotta take care of Kevin. Give him the burial he deserves. Jesus Christ. I’m so sorry, kid. I’m so sorry…

 To be continued

SPOILERS SWEETIES- Promotional Photos From Supernatural 10x01 "Black"

OMG. You're in the air for 15 hours and look what happens!

Here are the first promo pics from Season 10 episode 1

"BLACK"

I an squeeing so loud right now!!!

I can't deal with this. The whole thing. THE HAIR! I can't deal! This is going to be AWESOME. I guess now we know the bad song that Dean is singing to irritate everyone. I'm listening to it as I'm typing this!

LOOK AT HIM!

Just look!

I feel...as much as I'm looking forward to having Dean back...I am going to freakin' love Demon Dean.

Oh yeah.

I am in full swoon mode.

Meanwhile here's Sam wearing Jared's sling!

According to my magic countdown app...it is now 34 days until season 10.

I CAN'T WAIT!

Look at Dean's hair!

-sweetondean

Supernatural Headline News - 26 July Edition

I thought, before the epicness of Comic-Con, I'd do a quick wrap up of what's been happening in Supernaturaland this week!


Of course, last week, we had the epicness of the TCAs! Where everyone was really rather chatty!

We found out stuff about Sam's search for Dean, Dean's Demony tendencies and how freakin' awesome they sound, Castiel's lost grace, Crowley's o-oh moment about Dean, what's in store with the 200th episode (a-hem...musical-ish!). I mean, even Jeremy Carver was talking!

There were awesome photos...

Video interviews with Jensen and Jared, selfies with fans and sooooooo much more! If you missed any of it, I have been doing a TCAs MegaPost collection of all the goodness, so once you've read up on everything else going on this week, click here and check out our favourite cast and their chatty showrunner making us tremble in anticipation of season 10!

Right! So what else has been going on?




Well, Jensen finished directing his episode (ep 3) which means they went on to shooting the season premiere! Which will be directed by Bob Singer. Lots of fans where lucky enough to find shooting and see Jensen and Jared working - though not together I believe.

And check out this super cute video by some kids who found shooting, met Jared, and had the best day of their lives!

There was also this rather epically hot shot of Jensen on set...we need to discuss Demon Dean's hair! It looks awesome!

And now they're prepping episode 2!

There were a few casting spoilers doing the rounds as well!

This from TV|Line

Question: I need something to survive the Supernaturalhellatus! —Katherine
Ausiello: I see what you did there. You took hell and hiatus and smushed them together. That’s some clever wordplay. Here’s your scooprize: Scottish actress Ruth Connell (pictured, right) is joining the cast in the pivotal recurring role of Rowena, a mysterious old-school witch who, rumor has it, is looking to reclaim her power base.

Here's Ruth! Looks like we have another fiery ginger on our hands!

There were also a few tweets from actors who have booked rolls!

With press attention in full swing, there were a couple of articles outside of show information, for us to enjoy!

Jared talked about his family to People online!

With two little boys at home, Jared Padalecki wants to spend as much quality time with them as he can.

“After Supernatural I hope to kind of back off from the business and work more sporadically and be a father and be a basketball coach for my kids, maybe get into producing or something,” Padalecki, 32, told reporters at the CW TCA in Beverly Hills on Friday.

For now, the actor says there is no balance, but he makes sure he has dedicated family time for his sons, Thomas Colton, 2½, andShepherd, 7 months.

“I am violently protective of my — I call it my off-time — when I’m not working. I’m straight home and whether they’re in Vancouver or they’re in Seattle or wherever we happen to be I’m straight to them,” Padalecki explains.

“The other night I worked from 8 a.m. until 8 p.m. in Vancouver and got an overnight flight to Houston. It got me home at 8 a.m. and, you know what, I was there with my kids and I took a nap when they napped,” Padalecki says. “I do it whenever I can. Whenever I have the time to do it, I do it. But, simply put, there is no balance yet, but that’s okay.”

When the father of two isn’t home, his boys can still see their dad on TV thanks to his wife, Genevieve.

“You know what’s funny? My wife will put [Supernatural] on — and they’re too young to know what’s going on — but she’ll put it on when either I’m at work or I’m out of town so they can see their dad and they’ll say, ‘Daddy.’”

As for the cute moments that Padalecki really enjoys?

“Tom is my 2½-year-old and he’s a fully-functioning human being right now,” Padalecki jokes with a smile. “The milestones that I laugh at are when they start mimicking what Daddy says and Mommy — in a friendly way — [that] reminds Daddy that he has to use his children words.”

“And then little Shep just started to scoot, so Shep is 7 [months] and he just started to crawl. He also started … to [accept] me as part of his life. Usually, he was like, ‘What do you want?’ ‘I want Mommy.’ Now Shep smiles when he sees me.”

Padalecki admits that he hopes his boys will have the same brotherly bond he shares with his older brother.

“I am a younger brother and I love him and we were best men in each other’s weddings. [I] want them to be there for each other.”

[source]

And Misha talked GISHWHES...a lot! This year the likes of William Shatner, Orlando Jones and our very own Osric Chau will have teams!

This is from Entertainment Weekly

Supernatural‘s Misha Collins spends most of the year fighting demons (and sometimes angels) in a trench coat. And when Supernatural returns for it’s tenth season, Collins promises that between trying to find Dean and solving the problem of his own fading grace, Castiel will once again have his hands full. But until then, the 39-year-old actor is keeping busy by breaking world records alongside Orlando Jones and William Shatner. But why?

Well, because he can. August 2-9 will mark the fourth annual GISHWHES, the Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen, which Collins launched after being inspired by an annual scavenger hunt he participated in when he was an undergraduate at the University of Chicago. “It used to be a very academically rigorous and a very socially dismal place,” Collins says. “The only social interaction we had was in the basement of the library where there was a little coffee shop. We didn’t even have a student center. There was a study commissioned at the University of Chicago of the top 300 universities, and we ranked 300 out of 300 for social life. [We were] the very, very worst—under the Naval Academy, I might add. [But] we had this one bright spot on the calendar, which was a campus-wide scavenger hunt. Everyone basically stopped going to classes and stopped doing anything and just participated in the scavenger hunt for four days. And it was just so much fun.”

So a few years ago, when Collins made the mistake of promising his Supernatural fans he’d do something “fun” online, he found himself backed into a corner. His solution? A quick and easy scavenger hunt… that turned into a whole lot more. “It turned out to be immensely fun for me and the 300 people that participated in it, so I thought, ‘I’m going to try this again. I’m going to try to make it bigger,’” Collins says. “And so the next year, I named it GISHWES—Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen—and because I’d given it that name, I was bound and determined to get a Guinness World Record for having the largest scavenger hunt, which we succeeded in doing. We had like 6,000 participants and then we’ve broken, I don’t know, four or five additional Guinness World Records in the ensuing few years doing all manner of strange things. I think we’re going to try to break three more Guinness World Records this year.”

To participate in GISHWES, fans register online. When the hunt starts, participants will get their first glimpse at the growing list of crazy activities Collins has been compiling on his iPhone, which they are then tasked with completing. For example: “There’s definitely going to be some item or items related to Orlando Jones and William Shatner, who are both participating in the hunt this year,” Collins promises of the new to-do list. “I am going to mess with them.” Other than that, he says there will be something with acorns, and hopefully something related to the NSA or CIA, so long as it won’t land him in jail. After getting a tweet from NASA last year asking participants to stop, Collins has high expectations.

[source]

Misha did wonder about the accompanying photo...

Umm...a little, but what's new! 

This weekend is your last chance to sign up for GISHWHES, so if you want to do it...go sign up! (It's seriously fun!)

This week also saw the birthday of two of our Supernatural family, Jared "The Moose" Padalecki and Master "The Destroyer" Chau!

Photo in full skinny-legged glory!

Awwww they're so adorbz! 

And in super exciting news! The CW has launched an instagram account just for Supernatural! Make sure you're following as I'm pretty sure there will be lots of photos from this weekend as the team head down to Comic-Con!

And if you are heading to San Diego for Comic-Con or just following the action at home, here's what to look out for!

The Supernatural Panel will be in HALL H (the largest hall available) at 10.00am Sunday January 27. The panel will feature Jensen, Jared, Misha, Mark and Jeremy Carver and will be moderated by Brian Truitt from USA Today. FYI, the panel is not recorded, however some sly videos may emerge and undoubtedly there will be tweeting, plus there will be video interviews from the press room released.

The Supernatural crew will then be signing at the WB Booth at 11.30am to 12.15pm.

Then Jensen, Jared, Misha and Mark will be heading over to NerdHQ at 2.30pm for a conversation for a cause with Zach Levi. Tickets sold out in record time. NerdHQ stream their panels live and also upload them for you to watch later. Follow The Nerd Machine on YouTube to watch the panel!

Also, make sure you're following Suzanne Gomez and Holly Ollis from CW/WB Publicity.

And here's a link to a world clock so you can work all your times out locally!

Here's just a teaser of the awesomeness that can be expected!

And I can't finish off a news piece without something from the King of the Selfies... Here's Mark, Comic-Con bound!

And that was the week that was in Supernaturaland! 

I'll be bringing together all the awesomeness from Comic-Con, so keep an eye out for my Comic-Con MegaPost over the next few days!

Have a fun (safe, if you're going) Comic-Con weekend everyone! Thanks for supporting sweetondean!

-sweetondean

Women of Letters Podcast - Supernatural Season 2 Revisited.

On this week's Women of Letters Podcast, Jules from the Supernatural Wiki and I talk all about Supernatural Season 2.

We look at the mythology of the season, Sam and Dean's ever evolving relationship and how what happened back then, affects what we see now.

Supernatural Comic-Con 2014 TV Guide Cover - HI RES!

As promised, here is a lovely hi-res copy of the Comic-Con 2014 Supernatural TV Guide collectors edition cover!

Tweeted out by the Padaleski himself!

Here's the link!

PLUS THERE WILL BE A SUPERNATURAL PULL-OUT POSTER!

The 2014 Comic-Con Special includes exclusive content on popular Warner Bros. shows, including Person of Interest, The Big Bang Theory, The 100, The Originals and Childrens Hospital. In addition, the issue previews several upcoming series, including The CW's iZombie and Adult Swim's Mike Tyson Mysteries. There is also an exclusive Flash comic created by DC Entertainment and written by series executive producers Andrew Kreisberg and Greg Berlanti with DC chief creative officer Geoff Johns, plus a Supernatural-themed pull-out poster and more.

I absolutely love the cover!  Gorgeousness abounds! Boy howdy do the boys look epically beautiful. Though Dean's eyes look the wrong colour, (damn you photoshop) and I feel like it should be Sam giving Dean the shifty eye given the circumstances! It kind of nostalgically reminds me of these old promo pics!

Gosh they've grown up pretty... And their hair! And their scruff!

Anyhoo...objectification aside...it's so wonderful that they get these covers every year now! I can't wait to get my hands on this one!

Don't forget, it comes out July 22. Don't miss it!

I'm just going to stare at it for another hour or two...
-sweetondean